COUNTDOWN TO FEBRUARY WITH SAMMY SNOWMAN

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here, and I hope myself - 

and Wife Samantha - , find yourselves and your Families, well. 

I'd first like to thank Mr. Paul [Website Owner] and Mr. Malcolm [Our Moderator], for allowing me to open this Thread.

We would both like to apologise for not being able to conduct a Countdown to Christmas Pantomime last Month but we have had our hands full, with our 

recently arrived Twins, Sarah and Saul - 

The average gestation period for a Snow Lady is only a Month, so as quick as a flash, myself and Samantha quickly became, Snow Baby Parents. 

But the Twins are doing fine now and as you can see, we've been able to get plenty of Ice Cream and Frozen Yoghurt, into them.

It's not surprising that we have soon heard the patter of tiny, Snow Baby feet, as during that horrendous Summer, myself and Samantha had to spend many  Months, cooped up in our marital bed -

, in our Ice Palace - ,

just north of Dover, in Snowdown. 

Dad and Mun -   - Solomon and Sharon are both well, over at Snowshill in the Cotswolds, in Gloucestershire.

Sister Sally -  is also well but back in December, had as worried for a while.

No less than 19 times, Sal experienced symptoms of C.O.V.I.D [Cold Optimism Vastly Inflated Disorder].

I did want to begin this Thread about a Week ago but unfortunately suffered a severe bout of S.A.D. [Snowless Affected Dysfunction].

As you may recall, in my Day job I am Chief Negotiator for U.S.D.A.W. [Union of Snowmen Distributed Around the World] and last Winter, was involved with former colleagues in the E.U.S. [European Union of Snowmen].

Unfortunately the two Snowmen Unions were split asunder by Brr-Exit and were trying to organise a deal to facilitate, a Brr -reentry.

In the last few Weeks the two Snowmen have been in tense negotiations, trying  to thrash an arrangement for a S.S.W. [Sammy Snowman Warming].

A while ago, I managed to put together a Spreadsheet indicating the likely voting intention of Snowman members of both the E.U.S. and U.S.D.A.W., regarding the hopeful joint agreement for a S,S,W,. Unfortunately, as you can see from the Spreadsheet results below, we couldn't get a 100% agreement, for the hoped for, Sammy Snowman Warming:  

Some of my members in U.S.D.A.W. are so aggrieved by this lack of enthusiasm from E,U,S, members, that they've gone on hunger strike:

But as our S.E. Snow Political Correspondent - Nick Finnis suggests and as can be seen from the temperature graph below, this less than enthusiastic support for a Sammy Snowman Warming is currently not having the desired effect of raising the temperature sufficiently in the  Stratosphere above the North Pole, to result in a full blown, major Sammy Snowman Warming. Nick suggests we may gave to be content, with a minor Sammy Snowman Warming but warns that neither necessarily guarantee, cold and snow for the South East Region:

Tomorrow Morning, using more "dodgy" acronyms and A.I. [Artistic Indulgence[, I will expand on what I have planned for this Thread as we enter the final Month, of Meteorological Winter.

There will be Three parts to this item.

Part 1 - An analysis of the Winter to date, plus a look forward to what February may bring, featuring characters from last Winter's S.E. Regional Pantomime.

Part 2 - A 2 legged Football style Play-Off between the Coldies and the Mildies, for "bragging rights" in this Winter Season of  2022/23. Dates T.B.C. 

Part 3 - Some Puzzles/Quizzes for you to wile away those dreadful, long, hot and sweaty Summer Nights.

Stay cool.

Very best wishes.

Sammy and Samantha Snowmen.    

Edited January 26, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here.

I hope myself and my Wife Samantha find yourselves and your Families, well.

I'd like to apologise for my non appearance this Morning but I'm still involved in tense negotiations between my own Union, U.S,D.A,W.,  [Union of Snowmen Distributed Around the World] and, my former colleagues in the E.U.S. [European Union of Snowmen] before that BRR - Exit.

I then took time out to visit our Striking Snowmen, who are also conducting a Hunger Strike, to protest about our Employers wanting to impose those restrictive Zero Hour contracts, on our Synoptic allies.

I've also been trying to bolster support, for a S.S.W. [Sammy Snowman Warming] but that is giving me, a lot of frozen headaches!! 

In a short while I will be back to expand on my ideas for this item, as we head towards the final Month, of Meteorological Winter.

Stay cool.

Regards,

S.S.   

Edited January 27, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

I now  will expand on what I have planned for this Thread as we enter the final Month, of Meteorological Winter., using more "dodgy" acronyms and A.I. [Artistic Indulgence]. 

There will be Three parts to this item.

Part 1 - An analysis of the Winter to date, plus a look forward to what February may bring, featuring characters from last Winter's S.E. Regional Pantomime.

Part 2 - A 2 legged Football style Play-Off between the Coldies and the Mildies, for "bragging rights" in this Winter Season of  2022/23. Dates T.B.C. 

Part 3 - Some Puzzles/Quizzes for you to wile away those dreadful, long, hot and sweaty Summer Nights.

PART 1

As we can see below, December began on a very positive note for the S.E. Region, with quite a few of the Regions' members having their most substantial fall of early December Snowfall, since 2010.

          00z Sun 4th Dec. 2022                           00z Mon 5th DEC. 2022

 

Sammy would like to thank -  Greta the Greenland High,

for facilitating the arrival of -   - The Dwarf from the North, who managed to stick around a bit longer, than he normally does,

Sammy would also like to pay tribute to -  - 

Gina the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway] Corridor, who graciously closed her doors to -
 - Pernicious Victor [aka the Purple Blob/Polar Vortex], and his sycophantic pal -

 - Jethro Jetstream – All American Boy [aka,The Pest from the West]. 

Sammy was not that surprised by this early taste of Winter, as the Peruvian Gangster's Moll -

 - La Nina and Girlfriend of - .

tends to result, in a - , front loaded Winter.

But unfortunately and in time for Christmas, normal service was resumed and Pernicious Victor and his allies fought back and they eventually gained control of the G.I.N. [Greenland, Iceland, Norway] corridor. This resulted in a very unsettled, mild and wet spell of Weather:

         18z Christmas Day, 2022                      00z New Years Day, 2023

  

This mild and unsettled spell lasted until mid January, until a small low, at the base of a broad trough of Low Pressure ran along the English Channel, reintroducing an Arctic sourced, airmass.

          06z Mon. 16th Jan.,2023                      18z Weds. 18th Jan.,2023

   

Although temperatures dropped below average, especially at Night with some severe Frosts, our Region was now at the mercy of the -

  - dreaded "wishbone effect" , with any Snow/Wintry Showers confined to N.Scotland and exposed, windward coasts.

Very gradually and I mean very gradually the cold and frosty Weather finally relented, with our Region being the last to finally see temperatures returning close, to the late January average.

In a short while, Sammy Snowman will comment on this Afternoon's 12z Forecast Model runs, and the likely impacts on the S.E. Regions' Weather, as we move into the final Month, of Meteorological Winter.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman   

Edited January 27, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Sammy will now comment on this Afternoon's 12z Forecast Model runs, and the likely impacts on the S.E. Regions' Weather, as we move into the final Month, of Meteorological Winter.

But first some more "dodgy" acronyms for the Employers of Sammy, and his Allies:

ECMWF - Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy. FAX - Forecasts Are X-rated. GEM - Give 'Em Morsels. GFS - Go Freeze Satan. ICON - It's Cold {but] Only Notionally. JMA - Jam Model [for] All. UKMO - U Know [it's] Meteorological Overkill.

Sammy will begin by taking a look at how his Employers envisage seeing the Synopti9c situation looking like oh the first Day, of the last Month, of Meteorological Winter:

    12z ECMWF 1st Feb [t120], 2023            12z GEM 1st Feb [t120], 2023               

   

         12z GFS 1st Feb [t120], 2023           12z UKMO 1st Feb [t120], 2023

    

Sammy sees there is pretty much cross-model agreement, from those models above, for how the Synoptic situation will look in five Days, as we enter February.

The annoying Azores High, slightly displaced N.E. of it's home, resulting in a WNW flow, from the Atlantic. Sammy thinks this will result in a pretty dry spell of Weather, and a bit of frost about if Skies are clear at Night but nothing overly cold looking and certainly no Snow, on the offing.

 - Pernicious Victor is beginning to look menacing, over the N.E. of Canada but if we were lucky to see height rises further East over -   Gina the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway] Corridor, as long as Victor doesn't move further East, eventually this could allow,   - Greta the Greenland High and her Swedish Cousin -

  - Scandy Mandy the Scandinavian High, to appear on the scene.

But a cursory look further down the line, albeit in Fantasy Island territory, in 10 Days time -

   12z ECMWF Mon. 6th Feb [t240]           12z GFS Mon. 6th Feb [t240]
  

suggests this may all just be a cold -  - "pie in the sky" and certainly no sign yet,

of any baking going on, in the Stratosphere.

This is all leaving Sammy, feeling a bit despondent -   - Tonight.

Tomorrow in Part 2 of Countdown to February with Sammy Snowman, our genial host will look at the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off Match, arranged by F.I.F.A. [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association], and prospects for the two legged event.

The Play-Off has been called by F.I.F.A., as the C.E.T. [Coldies Excitement Threshold], is only a little above average and no clear "Winner" can be deci9ded upon, without this Play-Off taking place.

Sammy will introduce you all to his likely "Team" of Allies, and the opposition led by Pernicious Victor and his late outrageous transfer bid to sign and bifurcate     -  Jethtp Jetstream, having seemingly lost the services of the very fickle and money grabbing -

   - La Nina. 

The 2 Play-Off Matches will be "played" on the final 2 Saturdays, of February.

Leg 1 will be "played" over -    - Gina the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway] Corridor.

With Leg 2 being "played" over the homeland of -  -  Genovese Mo, the Genoa Low.

That being the Mediterranean Basin.  

The 2 legged Play-Off, will be officiated by 2 neutral, Nicks.

Nick Sussex, has been appointed Match Referee.

Whilst, Nick Finnis will be the S.A.R. [Synoptic Assistant Recorder].

Should no clear Winner be obvious, the decision will be made by the S.A.R., based on the accumulated % Synoptic possession gained by both "sides" [Coldies/Mildies], over the site of the 2 Play-Off Arenas.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.    

[Tom Montalbano]

Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here and Pinch, Punch etc, on the first Day of the final Month of Meteorological Winter. 

Sammy would like to apologise for his non appearance in the last few Days but he has been in conducting in-depth talks as chief negotiator for U.S.D.A.W. [Union of Snowmen Distributed Around the World], and the estranged E.U.S. [European Union of Snowmen].

Sammy also gave his support to striking Snowmen, on their Picket Line:

     

Sammy wanted to bolster support for the Snowmen Unions for their protest and Hunger Strike:

  

They are protesting about the very restrictive practise by their Forecast Model Employers of wanting to impose Zero Hour contracts, on the Allies of Sammy, such as:

  - Scandy Mandy the Scandinavian High, and - -  Genovese Mo, the Genoa Low.

Whereas the likes of -   - Jethro Jetstream and -

  - BARBARA the BARTLETT High /EUNICE the EURO SLUG, seem ro get as many hours as they can handle, and of course are being protected by -   - Pernicious Victor [aka the Purple Blob/Polar Vortex],

Sammy does have some reasonable news regarding his attempts to muster support amongst Snowmen Unnion members, for a S.S.W. [Sammy Snowmen Warming]. As you can see from Sammy's "sporeadsheet" below, there has been a gradual increase in numbers of Snowmen, willing to sacrifice themselves on a sacrificial "meltdown" in order to hopefully deliver some Snowy/Wintry Weather, to the S.E. Region:  

As Sammy stated a few Days ago, due to the ongoing debate about whether or not this Winter Season could be classed as being all thar Cold, F.I.F.A [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association], have decided to call a Play-Off, between the Cold and Mild giving Synoptics, to settle the argument, once and for all!!.

But as our C.E.T. [Current Excitement Threshold] Guru - Roger J Smith has illustrated on his Thread the C.E.T. isn't especially exciting, at the moment!!.

Now, a few details on this F.I.F.A. Play-Off between the Cold [Sammy Snowmen Utd] and the Mild Synoptics [Purple Blob Rovers].

Rovers won the toss and have won the right, to stage the 1at Leg.

The 1st Leg will be "played" over the 24 hours of Saturday 18th February, over the -

.  - G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway], corridor.

The 2nd Leg will be played over the 24 hours of Saturday 25th February, over the home ground of Sammy Snowman's defensive enforcer -

 - Genovese Mo, the Genoa Low and the Mediterranean Basin.

Tomorrow Morning, Sammy will post up details of the Format/Rules for the Winter Season 2022/23 decider.

That's all for Tonighr.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.     

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Morning all,

Sammy Snowman here, and I hope myself - 

and Wife Samantha - , find yourselves and your Families, well. 

I'd like to apologise for my non appearance over the last few Days but those very important negotiations between U.S.D.A.W [Union [of] Snowmen Distributed Around [the] World], for whom I'm chief negotiator, and the E.U.S. [European Union [of] Snowmen], have reached a crucial juncture. 

I've been protesting/picketing with our Members, regarding those very unfair and draconian beliefs that the powers that be want to impose Zero Hours Contracts on my Synoptic, allies.   

I'm pleased to say that more and more of our Union Members have expressed their intention to take Industrial action, over these harsh measures. This can be seen from the image of my voting intention Spreadsheets, below:

  / / 

I have also been assisting the Author, with his Winter Horse Racing Competition. 

It's not a well known fact but before I became Chief Negotiator for U.S.D.A.W., I was a pretty successful Snowman Jockey.

Below, is a Youtube clip of the last Race I won, before the constant Freeze/Thaw dieting, took a terrible toll on my body. 

When a Snowman Jockey gets to look like this -

, you know it's time to retire and seek out, a desk job.

In a short while, I will post up details of the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off Match called for by F.I.F.A [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association], to once and for all end the debate regarding who took the honours for this Winter, the Coldies of the Mildies.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.     

Edited February 4, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Sammy Snowman here again,

with details of F.I.F.A,'s Play-Off Match, to decide the winner of the 2022/23, Winter Season.

The Play-Off will be a 2 legged affair.

The 1st Leg will be "played" on Sat. 18th February, with the 2nd Leg to be played on Sat. 25th February.

The 2 Teams - PURPLE BLOB ROVERS, will play SAMMY SNOWMAN UNITED. 

Rovers won the toss and have elected to "play" the 1st Leg at Home ", over the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway] corridor.

The 2nd Leg will be "played" over the Mediterranean Basin, home of United's "no nonsense" defender - 

 -  Genovese Mo, the Genoa Low.

Both venues are now home to a 60,000 all seater Stadium, Both Legs of the Play-Off have already sold their quota of Match tickets. 

40K of tickets going to supporters of the Home Team and 20k of tickets, going to the supporters of the Away Team.

The catering rights have been awarded to Greggs the Bakers. Those in the cheap seats will be able to get a Meat Pie or a Cornish Pasty, whilst those able to afford a ticket in the V.I.P. [Vastly Inflated Personality] Lounge, will be able to purchase Avocado and Prawn Sandwiches.   

Unfortunately, those greedy "beggars" at S.K.Y.[Synoptic Know-all Yuppies], have bought the exclusive rights to broadcast both Legs of the Play--Off, which means it will be a P.P.V. [Poor People Victimised], event.

There is a rumour that S.K.Y. have resurrected their Football punditry duo of -

Richard "hairy hands" Keys -  and Andy Gray -  to front their Play-Off coverage.

But I.T.V. [Irrelevant Tactical Visions], will be broadcasting a Play-Off preview programme.

This will be hosted by - 

 - Mark Poopatch.

 He will be joined by analysts, the "bearded one" -

   - Roy Uninterested and -  - Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong.

ITV have also hired the Teenage Son of one of their Staff, to mirror South African mollusc -

 - Ollie the Octopus, in an attempt to mirror Ollie's psychic ability, to forecast the result, of important Matches.

This Young Lad [Julien the Juvenile], will be given some crayons to scribble on the -

 - Maddening Juvenile Obsession chart, on the wall of I.T.V.'s studio.

Julien the Juvenile has promised to keep his crayons away from the C.O.D. [Catastrophic Orifice [of] Disaster], in favour of the more beneficial phases, of the M.J.O. 

Those of you that can afford S.K.Y.'s Synoptic Channel, where both Legs of the Play-Off will be screened Live, will have probably noticed a box in the top left hand corner of the screen, with the letters S.T.D. and a clock counting down the time.

This doesn't mean that Sammy and his friends are about to contract a nasty disease but is counting down the time until the -

Switching Teleconnection Deadline/Synoptic Transfer Deadline, expires.

This deadline expires on Weds. 15th February and all transfer of Synoptics/Teleconnections, have to be completed by this date.

As Sammy stated a few Days ago, United have already lost the services of the very fickle, Peruvian Gangster's Moll -

 - La Nina.

But to limit the effect of losing her services, have made an outrageous bid to sign, in an attempt to bifurcate -

 - Jethro Jetstream.

Finally, just a word on the Match Officials, that F.I.F.A. have appointed to officiate, at the 2 Play-Offs:

REFEREE - Nick "Two Homes" Sussex. Obviously there is "dosh" to be made, in this Synoptic Refereeing lark!!

Only joking, Nick.

LINESMAN ONE - Roger J. Smith. Got the "Gig" for his sterling work in the C.E,T. [Current Excitement Threshold] Index Thread.

LINESMAN TWO -  Sebastian1973. Mentioned in dispatches for his work in the S.P.V. [Stop Pernicious Victor] Thread.

Our S.A.R [Synoptic Accounting Recorder], for both Play-Offs -  - Nick Finnis.

ITV will be screening their Play-Off preview programme on Sunday 19th February, at 8 P,M.

So, make a date in your diaries and join Poopatch, Uninterested, Wrong-Wrong-Wrong and Julien the Juvenile, when they preview this mouth watering, Play-Off decider.

**This Programme will be brought to you by - A.'R.U. [Acronyms 'R Us], C.F.S. [Coldies Fantasy Synoptics] and Greggs the Bakers, official sponsors of F.I.F.A.'s Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs**.

In a few Days time, Sammy will post up more details of the Format/Rules for the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs and Team news from Purple Blob Rovers base camp, on Baffin Island and his own Sammy Snowman United from their base camp. high in the French Alps.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.    

Edited February 4, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Morning all,

Sammy Snowman here and he hopes that he finds yourselves and your Families, well. 

Sammy would like to return to his previous post, and the rather confusing content, of it.

This concerns the details of I.T,V.'s [Irrelevant Tactical Visions] coverage, of the Play-Off between -

Purple Blob Rovers and Sammy Snowman Utd.

QUOTE: 

"The 1st Leg will be "played" on Sat. 18th February, with the 2nd Leg to be "played" on Sat. 25th February."

"ITV will be screening their Play-Off preview programme on Sunday 19th February, at 8 P,M."

Sammy realises that it is utterly pointless to have a preview programme, after the 1st Leg, has been "played".

Therefore,  - Mark Poopatch, on behalf of Irrelevant Tactical Versions will present the Play-Off preview programme,

Tonight at 8 P.M., accompanied by top pundits - 

the "bearded one" -  Roy Uninterested and -  Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong. 

They will also be joined by Julien the Juvenile, who will be given some crayons to scribble on the -

  - Maddening Juvenile Obsession chart, with the hope of predicting the Winner, of the Play-Off "Match".

 

As  S.K.Y.'s  [Synoptic Know-All Yuppies] Synoptic Channel reported that the S.T.D. [ Switching Teleconnection Deadline/Synoptic Transfer Deadline], expired at Midnight.   

As Sammy stated a few Days ago, United have already lost the services of the very fickle, Peruvian Gangster's Moll -

 La Nina., After a dazzling start to the Winter Season in early December, has been tempted to join Purple Blob Rovers, for the end of Season, Play-Off. Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], the narcissistic Owner/Manager/Player of Rovers tempted La Nina to sign for Rovers, by promising to pay for her Wedding to Bully Boy fiance -

It's common knowledge that the fickle La Nina has an uncooperative, rear end -

 - But careful fellas, not sure Signor Nino will appreciate you staring at his Fiancee's rear end!!

 

But to limit the effect of losing her services, Sammy Snowman Utd are in the process of completing the signing of - 

 - Jethro Jetstream the All American Boy [aka,The Pest from the West]., in a bid to to bifurcate him and unleash United's most feared Striker - . The Beast from the East, courtesy of -

 - Scandy Mandy the Scandinavian High,

Should that not develop, then Sammy Snowman Utd, may have to make do with a -

 - The Dwarf from the North,

as long as he can stay on the Synoptic Charts [pitch], a bit longer, than he normally does,

At least Sammy suggests he would be a far better option than a visit from - 

 Barbara the Bartlett High /Eunice the Euro Slug.

So, be sure to tune in at 8 P.M. Tonight, for ITV.'s Play-Off preview programme with Mark Poopatch, and the rest of the Team.

Bye for now,

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.          

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here and he hopes that he finds yourselves and your Families, well. 

 -  

Mark Poopatch, on behalf of Irrelevant Tactical Versions will now present the Play-Off "Match" between -

PURPLE BLOB ROVERS and SAMMY SNOWMAN UTD, accompanied by Synoptic analysts -

 - Roy Uninterested and -  - Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong. 

with colouring pencil predictions from Julien the Juvenile, and his -

    - M. J. O. [Maddening Juvenile Obsession]  chart and his -

  - E.P.F.[Early  Prediction Flexible] charts.

Latest "Team" news from Purple Blob Rovers and Sammy Snowman Utd.

Rovers have been training at their Baffin Island base camp -

 and have had a couple of warm up [cool down] Matches against local League sides -

St. John's Synoptic Saints, down un Newfoundland and Nuuk Northerners, over in Greenland.

Meanwhile, United have been training as their base camp, high in the French Alps, at Meribel -

It was here that Sammy and his colleagues "bumped" into Mr. Malcolm,, for a bit of non alcoholic [obvious;y], "Apres  Ski"   

Obviously, there is a lot of "dosh" to be made, at this moderating lark!! Only joking, Malcolm.

Sammy and his "Team" popped over to Switzerland to "play" against a St. Moritz Synoptics X1.

Then then made the short journey across the border with Italy, to "play" local league side, Courmayeur Casuals.

These warm up [cool down] "Matches" are to give both "Teams a bit of Synoptic confidence heading into the 1st Leg of the Play-Off, which will take place, this Saturday between 00z and 12z G.F.S [Go Freeze Satan] and the 00z and 12z ECMWF [Evey Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy], Forecast runs. By that time, there should be very little if any difference, between the American and European Models, therefore no unfair advantage, should be gained.

Uninterested and "Wrongie"  both agree that on current form,

Rovers will certainly be favourites to take a lead in the Home Leg of the Play-Off, over the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway], corridor.

Sammy Snowman Utd will be looking to limit any Synoptic advantage gained by Rovers, to give them a chance of overturning the aggregate possession gained by Purple Blob Rovers, in their Home Leg over the Mediterranean Basin, on Saturday 25th February.

Tomorrow Morning, Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex] and Sammy Snowman will publish their "Team" sheet for this coming Saturday's, 1st Leg.

Meanwhile, Sammy will post up the Format/Rule for this much eagerly awaited, Winter Season 2022/23 decider.

There will also be more punditry from, Uninterested and Wrongie. 

This preview programme was brought to you by Acronyms 'R Us and Greggs the Bakers, official Sponsors of -

F.I.F.A's [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association],Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.        

Edited February 16, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Sparky68]

A balmy 10c on the commute , is that a sign of the end of winter or will it be back to bite us in the *** is the question?

[Tn9]

Well what with SSW,which really is down welling ,so best place for sledging just west of Bexleyheath

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Morning all,

Sammy Snowman here and he hopes that he finds yourselves and your Families, well. 

Sammy would now like to post up some more details regarding, Tomorrow's 1st Leg Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off between -

Purple Blob Rovers and Sammy Snowman Utd.

Firstly as stated yesterday Evening, the S.T.D. [Synoptic Transfer Deadline/Switching Teleconnection Deadline], expired at Midnight.

Utd have completed their audacious swoop on -

   -  Jethro Jetstream the All American Boy [aka,The Pest from the West]., in a bid to to bifurcate him. but due to the late signing, he will not be eligible to "play" for Utd, until the 2nd Leg on Saturday, 25th February.

In a surprise move, F.I.F.A. [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association], have allowed Utd to move their 2nd Leg Play-Off Match to a different venue, to the one originally chosen. It will no longer be played in the Mediterranean Basin but at the home of - 

  -  Scandy Mandy the Scandinavian High,

That being above the Gulf of Bothnia, between Finland and Sweden - 

Utd are hoping to maximise the support of their own fans, and give them a chance of turning the Tie around, should Tomorrow's 1st Leg look to give them a "Mountain [probably Snowless] to climb", 

Both Legs of the Play-Off have been a sell-out. Rovers were allocated 40.000 tickets for their Home Leg Tomorrow, with 20,000 tickets going to Utd's fans. The reverse is true of the 2nd Leg, above the Gulf of Bothnia.

Now for the latest Team news.

Expected to make a reappearance for Rovers, will be the fickle Peruvian Gangster's moll -  - LA NINA.

Both sides will evidently be at full strength Tomorrow at Kick-Off, 00z on the American model, G.F.S. [Go Freeze Satan], and the European model, E.C.M.W.F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy].

It should come as no surprise that being half Italian, the Manager of Sammy Snowman Utd, has elected to field a very defensive iineup.

SVARLBAD SVEN - and SCANDY MANDY will be expected to keep a close eye on Rovers Captain and Manager -

PERNICIOUS VICTOR [aka Polar Vortex]. Meanwhile,  - GENOVESE MO [the Genoa Low], will be looking to send -

 - BARBARA the BARTLETT HIGH/EUNICE the EURO SLUG, to sleep with da fishes!! Good luck with that, Mo.

F.I.F.A. have announced a change to the Match Officials.

Rovers have been allowed to nominate the 1st Leg Referee, which will be - MUSHYMANROB.

Running the lines will be - ROGER J.SMITH C.E.T. [i] [Canadian Excitement Threshold [index]] and continuing the International flavour -

the other line will be the responsibility of - SEBASTIAN1973 [Our Dutch Stratosphere Guru].

Our 2 neutral Nicks, FINNIS and SUSSEX, will be our S.A.R.s [Synoptic Assistant Recorders], for both Legs, of the Play-Off.  

Sammy Snowman Utd have chosen  - BLAST FROM the PAST, to referee the 2nd Leg above the Gulf of Bothnia, set to take place, Tomorrow Week.

In a short while, Sammy will return with a report on the likely Weather conditions above the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway] corridor, for Tomorrow's 1st Leg, of the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off and a bit more analysis from Roy Uninterested and Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong and the Format, for both Legs of the Play-Off decider.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.    

[Tom Montalbano]

Sammy would now like to file a report on the likely Synoptic/Weather conditions for Tomorrow's 1st Leg of the Winter Season 2022/23, decider.

Purple Blob Rovers Captain/Manager/Owner, the all action Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], will be looking to direct his Team's affairs, from Rovers base camp above Baffin Island, as the 1st Leg kicks off at 00z. There is likely to be a wind somewhere between S.W. and W., close to the Stadium, above the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway], corridor. Temperatures likely to be between 0c and a few degrees above, during the 1st half. It looks likely to be mainly dry but I suppose you couldn't rule out a little Rain/Sleet or Snow.

 -  -

  

As the "Teams"make their way out on to the Pitch for the 2nd half, [12z]. very little will likely have changed. 

 

Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], will still be looking to direct his Team's affairs, from Rovers base camp above Baffin Island. There is still likely to be a wind somewhere between S.W. and W., close to the Stadium, above the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway], corridor.

Again, temperatures are likely to be between 0c and a few degrees above, during the 2nd half. It looks likely to be mainly dry but with a bit more Rain/Sleet or Snow, about.

 -  -

  - 

What is apparent from the above is that members of Sammy Snowman Utd, appear to have remained in the Dressing Room, for the entire Match.

There is no sign of Greta the Greenland High, Svalbard Sven, Scandy Mandy or Genovese Mo the Genoa Low.

This doesn't bode well for Utd, If this is how the 1st Leg of the Play-Off will pan out, surely Sammy and his "Team" will give themselves too much to do, come the 2nd Leg of the Play-Off over the Gulf of Bothnia, a Week Tomorrow.

Roy Uninterested and - Ian WrongfWrong-Wrong, are so gobsmacked by the lack of commitment from Sammy Snowman Utd, in such an important "Match", that they have been left speechless.

"Wrongie" is so disappointed that he wishes that he had switched his allegiance to the B.B.C. [Better Bet {for] Coldies], and -

   - Gary Spinnaker and his highlights programme, "Synoptics of the Day". 

During the Half-Time interval Tomorrow Morning [around 09z or so], Sammy will post up his thoughts on how, the 1st half went for Sammy Snowman Utd.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.    

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here and he hopes that he finds yourselves and your Families, well. 

Sammy would like to apologise for his non appearance this Morning, for the 1st Leg Play-Off between -

 Purple Blob Rovers and Sammy Snowman Utd, in the Winter Season 2022/23 decider.

The 1st Leg was abandoned at short notice, due to anticipated Stormy conditions in the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway] corridor, giving rise to very difficult travelling conditions, for the expected 60,000 crowd in the Stadium  overlooking the G.I.N. corridor.

F.I.F.A. ]Fantasy Island Fanatics Association], have announced the revised dates, for both Legs of the Play-Off.

The 1st Leg will now take place over the G.I.N. corridor, between 00z and 12z on Tuesday 21st February [t60].  

Weather conditions look far more conducive for the 1st Leg to go ahead, along with the likelihood of little if any travel disruption  causing problems for fans of both Rovers and Utd:

  - 

The rescheduled date of the 2nd Leg, will now be on Tuesday 28th February [t228], when again Weather conditions are Forecast to be far more acceptable over the 2nd Leg venue -  [the Gulf of Bothnia, between Finland and Sweden] , with no Weather problems, anticipated:

 - 

But Owner of Purple Blob Rovers, Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], is reported to be incensed by F.I.F.A.'s decision and has accused the Owner of Sammy Snowman Utd of trying to bribe F.I.F.A., with some -

- Brown Envelopes stuffed with Mafia, donated funds.

Rovers Owner stated in a Tweet, "What do you expect when the Owner of Utd, is half - Italian and everyone knows that a Member of Utd's Playing Staff -   - Genovese Mo [the Genoa Low], has Mafia connections!!"

With the rescheduling of the Play-Offs, I.T.V, [Irrelevant Tactical Visions], will now be broadcasting a preview programme of the 1st Leg Play-0ff at 8 P.M., on Monday 27th February.

I.T.V. anchor -  - Mark Poopatch will be bringing you the latest Team news, and along with -

 - Roy Uninterested and -  -  Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong, will be in the I.T.V. Studio along with -

Julien the Juvenile, with his predicting pencils and -  - M. J. O. [Maddening Juvenile Obsession]  chart,

to give their predictions for the likely outcome, of this much eagerly awaited, 1st Leg Play-Off.

Who knows, by this time, Uninterested may have found his razor and get rid of that fungus that has taken over the bottom half, of his face!!

Will see you all on Monday.

Here's hoping that my S.S.W. [Sammy Snowman Warming], will be starting to pay dividends by this time!!

Night all.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.        

Edited February 18, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Morning all,

Sammy Snowman here and he hopes that he finds yourselves and your Families, well. 

Sammy would first like to explain as to what happened regarding, Today's 1st Leg Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off decider between -

Purple Blob Rovers and Sammy Snowman Utd. 

Sammy and his Utd colleagues asked for the 1st Leg to be postponed for a further 24 hours, as they were still travelling back from Switzerland, after "playing" St.Moritz Synoptics, in a warm up [cool down], Friendly. 

F.I.F.A. [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association] have agreed with this request and the 1st Leg will now take place, Tomorrow [22nd].

The 2nd Leg will now take place on Tuesday 28th February, the final Day of Meteorological Winter.

Rovers Owner -  - Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], is reported to be extremely angry at F.I.F.A.'s decision, for allowing Sammy Snowman Utd, to - "cherry pick" these -  - dates. 

Tomorrow's 1st Leg, 1st half will be centred around the G.F.S. [Go Freeze Satan] and the E.C.M.W.F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy] 00z Model runs, at t00z. The 2nd half will feature the G.F.S. [Go Freeze Satan] and the E.C.M.W.F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy] 12z Model runs, at t00z.

I.T.V. [Irrelevant Tactical Visions], will now be broadcasting their preview programme of the 1st Leg Play-0ff at 8 P.M. Tonight, when -

 - Mark Poopatch will be bringing you the latest Team news, and along with -

 - Roy Uninterested and -   - Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong,

 will be in the I.T.V. Studio along with -

Julien the Juvenile, with his predicting pencils and -  - the M. J. O. [Maddening Juvenile Obsession]  chart,

Poopatch and his Studio guests will have the likely Synoptic/Teleconnection Line-Ups for both Rovers and Utd, in Tomorrow's 1st Leg, and will hopefully be able to explain the Rules for these Play-Off "Matches".

Sammy is reported to be delighted with the solidarity shown by members of U.S.D.A.W. [Union [of] Snowmen Distributed Around [the] World], and the E.U.S. [European Union [of] Snowmen], with their Hunger Strike and sacrificial meltdown, that has led to a S.S.W. [Sammy Snowman Warming] but acknowledges that it will have no bearing on Tomorrow's 1st Leg Play-Off and is not guaranteed to have any influence on next Tuesday's, 2nd Leg.

Meanwhile, to give his "Team" confidence of defeating Utd, Pernicious Victor has shown the following Youtube clip to his "Team", on several occasions, which occurred during pre-Season training last Year, in November.

As Victor suggested to his "Team", this is what you call "Lake Effect" Snow and not that bit of "dandruff" that those in the South East of England, may currently be anticipating after the Sammy Snowman Warming!!:

Sammy Snowman will be back at 8 P.M. Tonight, to introduce I.T.V.'s 1st Leg Play-Off preview programme.

See you all, later.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.    

Edited February 21, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

I.T.V. [[Irrelevant Tactical Visions], hope yourselves and your Families are well and would now like to present their preview programme of the 1st Leg Play-0ff, of the Winter Season 2022/23 decider. Below, are Tonight's preview panel, headed by Presenter =  

- Mark Poopatch, who will be joined by -

  - Roy Uninterested and -   - Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong, along with -

"Julien the Juvenile", with his predicting pencils and -  - the M. J. O. [Maddening Juvenile Obsession]  chart,

They will also be joined by Special Guest -   - "Alex the Adult" [Deakin].

Lets start with the "Team" news and the Synoptic/Teleconnection line-ups, for the "Kick-Off" at 00z.

                                                                                                  PURPLE BLOB ROVERS

               Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex,Captain].

 -  Barbara the Bartlett High /Eunice the Euro Slug.  -   La Nina.

                                                                                                SAMMY SNOWMAN UTD  

                         - Greta the Greenland High.  - Genovese Mo the Genoa Low. 

                                                                            - Scandy Mandy the Scandinavian High,

                                                                            - Sammy Snowman [non playing Captain].

Only 3 "Players" allowed in these  Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off Matches.

Rovers have decided to play their recent new acquisition, Peruvian Gangster's Moll, La Nina. 

Captain [Pernicious Victor], will be looking to dictate play in his free roaming role. and will be hoping that new signing La Nina will be able to negate any threat from Utd's threesome.

Meanwhile, Non-Playing Utd Captain Sammy Snowman will be encouraging his Team, from his technical area.

His threesome of "Greta Greenie", Genovese Mo and Scandy Mandy, will be playing in a very defensive mode and hoping to nullify any attacking threat, from the Rovers threesome.

Now Special Guest, Alex the Adult [Deakin], would like to make his contribution and like "Julien the Juvenile", has brought along his colouring pencils to highlight his very insightful analysis, in this very detailed video clip, and makes some observations about the current Sammy Snowman Warming:

 - Uninterested and -  - "Wrongie" are in agreement that Rivers are strong favourites to  win the 1sr Leg, comfortably.

They both suggest that Utd need to limit the 1st Leg Synoptic possession lost to acceptable levels, to give them a chance of overturning the deficit, in the 2nd Leg [00z/12z, Tuesday 28th February]. 

Be sure to tune in at "Half Time" [Tomorrow Morning], for a report on how the 1sr Half unfolded.

This preview programme was brought to you by Acronyms 'R Us and Greggs the Bakers, official Sponsors of -

F.I.F.A's [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association],Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.   

[Tom Montalbano]

Sammy Snowman here again

I will now file a report on the 1st half of the 1st Leg of the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off,

Both "Teams" [Purple Blob Rovers/Sammy Snowman Utd], came out on to the pitch, in the Stadium above the G.I.N. [Greenland/Iceland/Norway] corridor at around 11.45 P.M., when the majority of you were hopefully snuggled up in bed.

The 60,000 crowd were asked to stand and respect the anthems, of both "Teams".

Being the Away "Team", Sammy Snowman Utd had their anthem played first:

The 40,000 strong contingent of Rover's fans taunted the Utd fans with: 

"Hey, where's the Snowman?" Hey, what's a Snowman?"

At this point, Sammy would like to apologise to Mike Rutherford and Genesis for the arrogance and rudeness, of the Rover's fans,

Then it was the turn of Purple Blob Rovers, to have their anthem played:

The 20,000 strong Army of Utd's fans, hit back with: 

"Purple Blob all over a Model's chart.

Don't know whether to cry or fart?".

Sammy would like to apologise to the Family of the late Jimi Hendrix but Utd's fans were just responding to the taunts, of the Rover's fans.

Hostilities, were well and truly joined.

The 1st Leg Play-Off "kicked off£ at precisely 00z.

The Line-Ups for both "Teams" were as the same as reported, yesterday Evening:

                                                                                   PURPLE BLOB ROVERS

      Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex, Captain].

       Barbara the Bartlett High /Eunice the Euro Slug. La Nina.

                                                                         SAMMY SNOWMAN UTD 

     Greta the Greenland High. Genovese Mo the Genoa Low.

                         Scandy  Mandy the Scandinavian High,

                      Sammy Snowman [non playing Captain].

For the sake of fairness, F.I.F.A. asked both "Teams" to nominate a Forecast Model that they would like to represent their Synoptic performance, in both Legs of the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off.

Purple Blob Rovers nominated the American model, G.F.S. [Go Freeze Satan], with Sammy Snowman Utd plumping for the European model, E.C.M.W.F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy].  

These Play-Offs are not about scoring goals but all about which "Team" has the majority of Synoptic possession over the majority of the 500hPa charts, at 00z/12z in Today's 1st Leg and at 00z/12z, in next Tuesday's [28th], 2nd Leg. 

As would have been expected, there was no difference between the 2 models at 00z.

                         G.F.S. 500hPa 00z 22nd Feb.            E.C.M.W.F 500hPa 00z 22nd Feb.

                    

It was a very "cagey" 1st Half, with neither "Team" wanting to commit their chosen "players", in advanced positions.

But in typical brash and confident mo0de, Rover's Skipper [Pernicious VictorPolar Vortex], can be seen bossing the "play", in the far N.W., of the pitch.

Roy Uninetrested and  Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong,

both agree that - Greta the Greenland High,

needs to "press"  Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex] more in the 2nd Half,

to stop him having so much Synoptic possession, and controlling the "Match".

The 2nd Half will "kick-off" with the 12z runs of Go Freeze Satan [G.F.S.] and E.C.M.W.F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy].

In the meantime the crowd are enjoying some Half Time sustenance, supplied by Greggs the Bakers.

Cornish Pasties and Steak and Kidney Pies are available to those, in the "cheap" seats.

Meanwhile those that have tickets in the V.I.P. [Very Inflated Personality] seats, have also got the choice of Avocado/Prawn Sandwiches.

Sammy would have to concede that Rovers, courtesy of their Captain [Pernicious Victor/Polar Vortex], have had more of the Synoptic possession, during the 1st Half.

Just a final point about Utd's audacious last minute signing of -

Jethro Jetstream the All American Boy [aka,The Pest from the West].

Jethro has been registered with F.I.F.A. , under the name of Bifurcating Billy [Wilhelm].

and Billy is hoping to make his debut for Utd next Tuesday above the Gulf of Bothnia, between Finland and Sweden, in the very crucial 2nd Leg of the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off, decider.

Later Today, Sammy Snowman will file a report on the 2nd Half of the 1st Leg Play-Off, after the 12z model runs, have been published.

This programme has been brought to you by - Acronyms 'R Us and Greggs the Bakers, official Sponsors of F.I.F.A.'s  Winter Season 2022/23, Play-Offs.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.    

Edited February 22, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here and in conjunction with  I.T.V. [[Irrelevant Tactical Visions], I would now like to file a report on the 2nd half of the 1st Leg Play-0ff of the Winter Season 2022/23 decider, between Purple Blob Rovers and Sammy Snowman Utd, the -

 Status Quo, pretty much remained unchanged from the 1st Half.

Using the preferred model for each "Team" the American G,F.S, [Go Freeze Satan] and the European E,C,M.W,F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy], we can see below that nothing really changed in the 2nd Half, of the 1st Leg Yie.

        G.F.S. 500hPa 12z 22nd Feb.            E.C.M.W.F 500hPa 12z 22nd Feb.

 - 

Virtually none of the protagonists from either "Team", seemed to make it out from the comfort of the Dressing Room, for the entire 12 hours of the 1st Leg. 

Only the Captain of Purple Blob Rovers   Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], had any influence on the 1st Leg,

His fellow "Players",   Barbara the Bartlett High /Eunice the Euro Slug and -La Nina, were conspicuous, by their absence.  

The same can be said for Sammy Snowman Utd, their 3 "Players" -

Greta the Greenland High, Genovese Mo the Genoa Low. and -

Scandy Mandy the Scandinavian High, even got out on the "Pitch".

Apart from the egotistical Captain of Rovers, the egotistical -    Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], there vould well be a few changes to the 2nd Leg, Line-U[s.

I'm certain that non-playing Captain of Utd, Sammy Snowman will be expecting a lot more from the "Team" that he selects, for that 2nd Leg next Tuesday. He will no doubt be looking to "play" new signing - Bifurcating Billy [Wilhelm].

ex stalwart of Rovers, Jethro Jetstream the All American Boy [aka, The Pest from the West].

Sammy would just to take a look at how the 2nd Leg is shaping up, that will be "played" at Utd's home Stadium overlooking the -

Gulf of Bothnia, between Finland and Sweden.

Below, is how both the preferred model of each "Team" ,the European E,C,M.W,F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy], of Sammy Snowman Utd, and the American model  Go Freeze Satan [G.F.S.], currently sees the Synoptic situation shaping up at t132 and t144, respectively.  

    E.C.M.W.F. 500hPa 00z 28th Feb.          E.C.M.W.F 500hPa 12z 28th Feb.

 / 

       G.F.S.500hPa 00z 28th Feb.                   G.F.S. 500hPa 12z 28th Feb.

 / 

I'm sure Sammy will be more content than Rover's Player/Manager [Pernicious Victor/Polar Vortex].

But Utd will have to be more positive than Today's "Match", as calculations from Today's P.P.E. [Percentage Performance Energy], give a 1se Leg Scoreline of - Purple Blob Rovers 10& Sammy Snowman Utd 0%. Half Time [5% - 0%].

Be sure to tune in at 8 P.M, next Monday [27th], for  I.T.V.'s [Irrelevant Tactical Visions], 2nd Leg preview programme, which will be presented by -

- Mark Poopatch, who will be joined by -

 - Roy Uninterested and - - Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong, along with -

"Julien the Juvenile", with his predicting pencils and -  - the M. J. O. [Maddening Juvenile Obsession]  chart,

This highlights programme has been brought to you by, Acronyms 'R Us and Greggs the Bakers,

official Sponsors of F.I.F.A's [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association],Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs.

Regards,

Tom Q.   

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here and along with I.T.V. [[Irrelevant Tactical Visions], hope yourselves and your Families are well and would now like to present their preview programme for the 2nd Leg Play-0ff, of the Winter Season 2022/23 decider.

Below, are Tonight's preview panel, headed by Presenter -

  - Mark Poopatch, who will be joined by -

the "bearded" one -  -Roy Uninterested and - - Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong, along with -

"Julien the Juvenile", with his predicting pencils and - the -M. J. O. [Maddening Juvenile Obsession]  chart,

plus another one of Julien's colourful creations -  

In a few hours time, the above I.T.V. "Team" will be taking their seats in the specially constructed Studio above Sammy Snowman Utd's home ground, high above the -  - Gulf of Bothnia, between Finland and Sweden.

The Line-Ups for both "Teams" have been announced, and are as follows:

                                                                    SAMMY SNOWMAN UTD

- Greta the Greenland High,   - Genovese Mo the Genoa Low.   

                                                                       - Scandy  Mandy the Scandinavian High,

Substitute -   - new signing Bifurcating Billy [Wilhelm], formerly - Jethro Jetstream [aka, The Pest from the West].   

                                                                                 PURPLE BLOB ROVERS

                                                                       - Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex, Captain]. 

                 - Barbara the Bartlett High /Eunice the Euro Slug. - La Nina.   

Both Teams remain unchanged from the 1st Leg and Pernicious Victor is so arrogant and confident  confident that they can defend their 10% P.P.E,. [Percentage Performance Estimated] advantage from the 1st Leg, that he hasn't even bothered to name a Substitute.

Meanwhile, Sammy Snowman [Utd's non-playing Captain], has named new signing Bifurcating Billy [Wilhelm], as his Substitute who may make an appearance should the "Match" situation look likely to suit his style of play. 

Therefore his 3 Man "Team" will play for the entirety of both halves [00z and 12z E.C.M.W.F./G.F.S.] model runs.

But both Uninterested and Wrongie both agree that if Utd are to" snatch victory from the jaws of defeat", they are going to have to be far more positive if they are to overturn that 10% Synoptic deficit they suffered in last Wednesday's, 1st Leg. 

Be sure to tune in Tomorrow Morning, when Sammy Snowman will file a report on the 1st Half of the 2nd Leg, of the Winter Season 2022/23, Play-Off decider,

This preview programme was brought to you by Acronyms 'R Us and Greggs the Bakers, official Sponsors of -

F.I.F.A's [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association],Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.     

Edited February 27, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Morning all,

Sammy Snowman here, non-playing Captain of Sammy Snowman Utd and along with I.T.V. [[Irrelevant Tactical Visions], hope yourselves and your Families are well and would now like to file a Half-Time report, on the 2nd Leg Play-0ff, of the Winter Season 2022/23 decider.

Both "Teams" [Purple Blob Rovers/Sammy Snowman Utd], came out on to the pitch, in the Stadium above the Gulf of Bothnia -  at around 11.45 P.M., when the majority of you were hopefully snuggled up in bed.

The 60,000 crowd were asked to stand and respect the anthems, of both "Teams".

Being the Away "Team", Purple Blob Rovers had their anthem played first:

The 40,000 strong contingent of Utd's fans taunted the Rovers' fans with: 

"Purple Blob all over a Model's chart.

Don't know whether to cry or fart?".

Sammy would like to apologise to the Family of the late Jimi Hendrix.

Then it was the turn of Sammy Snowman Utd, to have their anthem played:

A small contingent of Rover's 20,000 fans hit back with: 

"Hey, where's the Snowman?" Hey, what's a Snowman?", which hung in the cold Midnight air, hanging over the Gulf of Bothnia.

At this point, Sammy would like to apologise to Mike Rutherford and Genesis for the arrogance and rudeness, of the Rover's fans,

Below, is how both the preferred model of each "Team" ,the European E,C,M.W,F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy], of Sammy Snowman Utd, and the American model  Go Freeze Satan [G.F.S.], depicted the Synoptic situation at  Kick-Off time [t0z].

    E.C.M.W.F. 500hPa 00z 28th Feb.               G.F.S. 500hPa 00z  28th Feb.            

   / 

 - Mark Poopatch,  - Roy Uninterested and -  -  Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong

have been encouraged by the more positive 1st Half performance, by Utd.

 A stronger 1st Half performance by Greta the Greenland High, has limited the amount of influence -

  - Rovers Captain , Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], has had compared to the 1st Leg, on 23rd February.

Due to the attention of Greta, Pernicious Victor, has become "stretched" at the back.

 - Genovese Mo the Genoa Low, has also had an impressive 1st Half and as was hoped for has sent -

-  Barbara the Bartlett High /Eunice the Euro Slug, to "sleep with da fishes", in the Med.

Peruvian Gangster's Moll, La Nina -  - has also had seemingly little influence on the 1st Half, "play".

As was stated just before the 1st Leg, these Play-Offs are not about scoring goals but all about which "Team" has the majority of Synoptic possession over the majority of the 500hPa charts, at 00z/12z in 23rd February's 1st Leg and at 00z/12z, in Today's 2nd Leg. 

The 2nd Half will "kick-off" with the 12z runs of Go Freeze Satan [G.F.S.] and E.C.M.W.F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy].

In the meantime the crowd are enjoying some Half Time sustenance, supplied by Greggs the Bakers. Cornish Pasties and Steak and Kidney Pies are available to those, in the "cheap" seats. Meanwhile those that have tickets in the V.I.P. [Very Inflated Personality] seats, have also got the choice of Avocado/Prawn Sandwiches.

Even though Utd have performed far better than the 1st Leg they still need to be positive in the 2nd Half, if they are to overturn the aggregate P.P.E. [Percentage Performance Estimation], scoreline of - Sammy Snowman Utd 5% - Purple Blob Rovers 15%.

2nd Leg [Half Time] - [Sammy Snowman Utd 5% - Purple Blob Rovers 5%]. 

Be sure to tune in at 8 P.M, this Evening for  I.T.V.'s [Irrelevant Tactical Visions], 2nd Half of the 2nd Leg Highlights show, to find out who has been crowned Winner of the Winter Season Synoptics Cup, 2022/23.

This Synoptics Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs highlights programme, was brought to you by Acronyms 'R Us and Greggs the Bakers, official Sponsors of -   F.I.F.A's [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association],Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.      

Edited February 28, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle

[Tom Montalbano]

Good Evening all,

Sammy Snowman here, non-playing Captain of Sammy Snowman Utd and along with I.T.V. [[Irrelevant Tactical Visions], hope yourselves and your Families are well and welcome to the final Evening, of Meteorological Winter. 

I would now like to file a 2nd Half report, on the 2nd Leg Play-0ff, of the Winter Season 2022/23 decider.

  - the Status Quo, pretty much remained unchanged from the 1st Half. 

Using the preferred model for each "Team" the European E,C,M.W,F. [Every Coldies Morning Winter Fantasy], and the American G,F.S, [Go Freeze Satan] , we can see below that nothing really changed in the 2nd Half, of the 2nd Leg Tie:

    E.C.M.W.F 500hPa 12z 28th Feb.           G.F.S. 500hPa 12z 28th Feb. 

  

As in the1st Half, there were strong performances from both -

 -  Greta the Greenland High, who again had just enough nous to limit the amount of influence -

  -  Rovers Captain , Pernicious Victor [aka Polar Vortex], had compared to that 1st Leg, on 23rd February.

Again, due to the tight "marking" of Greta, Pernicious Victor, became "stretched" at the back.

- Just as in the 1st Half, Genovese Mo the Genoa Low, had an impressive 2nd Half and marked -

 - Barbara the Bartlett High /Eunice the Euro Slug, out of the "Match".

Peruvian Gangster's Moll, La Nina -  again had seemingly little influence on the 2nd Half, "play".

In a bid to overturn the aggregate 5% deficit, Sammy Snowman called on his new signing - - Bifurcating Billy [Wilhelm], formerly -  -  Jethro Jetstream [aka, The Pest from the West]. 

But as you can see from below, Billy wasn't able to bifurcate enough for his "Teammates": 

  

Therefore, the "Match" Result was Sammy Snowman Utd 5% - Purple Blob Rovers 5%.  

This resulted in an aggregate P.P.E. [Percentage Performance Estimation] scoreline over the 2 Legs of the Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Off decider of -

 Sammy Snowman Utd 5% - Purple Blob Rovers 15%.

Despite Sammy Snowman and his U.S.D.A.W. [Union [of] Snowmen Distributed Around [the] World]/E,U.S. [European Union [of] Snowmen]; Teammates, sacrificing themselves in a S.S.W. [Sammy Snowman Warming] -

 - it's all proved, "too little too late"

Perhaps loosing so many talented European Snowmen to "BRR-EXIT", proved to be Utd's undoing!!

Tomorrow Morning,

 - Mark Poopatch,

  - Roy Uninterested and -   - Ian Wrong-Wrong-Wrong

will take a look back at a Winter Season that began so promisingly for Sammy and his Utd "Teammates" but ultimately ended in defeat.

This Synoptics Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs highlights programme, was brought to you by Acronyms 'R Us, Greggs the Bakers, and A.I. [Artistic Indulgence] official Sponsors of -   F.I.F.A's [Fantasy Island Fanatics Association],Winter Season 2022/23 Play-Offs.

Regards,

Sammy Snowman.    

Edited February 28, 2023 by Tom Quintavalle